Steadman Family

Got back from my second trip to Chicago in the last three weeks on Wednesday. It’s nice visiting the main office as it makes me feel like I actually have a job still. Hopefully all of that will change in the next few weeks as I learn a little more about some of the job opportunities I’m working on. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Melinda and I are heading out to Vegas again this year. We’re attending a meeting that several other parents who have lost a child to diffuse pontine glioma have arranged. I’m not exactly sure what to expect at this point, but I’m hoping to come away with some plan to begin helping other families deal with this form of cancer. 

It’s hard getting too excited about this trip as I’m sure the whole experience is going to be an emotional roller coaster. I’ve read the stories of most of these families and have cried at the loss of each kid. I’m not sure how to prepare myself to meet them. Guess I’ll just focus on my desire for some good to come from all of this and comfort that they can offer me. 

Let’s just hope that what happens in Vegas doesn’t stay in Vegas. 

The sites been down for a few days while we addressed an issue with some copyrighted material posted in a comment. It’s all been taken care of in accordance with US Title Code 17, 512, section C. Fun stuff I can assure you.

Our hearts go out to Gwen, Steve, Alexander and Zoe. You can follow along and support Alexander’s progress at akasnoff.blogspot.com.

The company that I’ve worked for the past six plus years was bought out last November. I’ve spent the last seven months watching people quit, shipping things to the new office in Chicago and dumping 10 years of company history into the garbage. So for all you ex-Requisite folks, here’s a picture of ALL of the remaining Colorado employees escorting the company sign to the dumpster.

So I have to find a balance. Not just in my posts, but also in my life. I have to find a way to grieve without missing the wonders going on around me. I’m not sure exactly what that means or how to do it, but it’s my first post in six weeks so stop complaining.

Speaking of the baby, we’ve been working on name ideas. Melinda wanted something that was an anagram of Benjamin, but that left us with very choices. Not that I don’t want a son named ‘Ninja.’ Madie insists that it’s a girl and immediately vetoes any masculine names as “too boyish.” I’m being helpful by suggesting names that sound funny at first, but get old really fast. Like Coffee Annan Steadman. We hope to be making a formal announcement on the front runners shortly, but welcome your comments and recommendations in the meantime.

I had my first day back in the office today. Well, sort of. I took advantage of a cold front to sleep in – nothing says “stay in bed” like a cool morning. I rolled into the office at 9:30 which seems to be the new official start time as there are only six of us left my office. Fortunately, someone made coffee before I showed up. And then I left at 1 for a doctor’s appointment. I think it’s best to ease myself back in without too much stress. I should be working a full eight hours sometime this year. Maybe.

It’s hard watching Madie ride her bike alone outside during the day. She and Ben were so close in age that they never had much playtime without the other. I’m really thankful that Madie loves going to school three days a week and is excited about taking some additional classes at the rec center.

Melinda and I are doing fairly well. We both have our tear-jerker moments when we find something of Ben’s around the house, but we talk about our feelings and muddle through each day.

We’re hoping to have the plans for Ben’s garden completed shortly and will put out a call for volunteers once we’ve got our ducks in a row. We’ll start posting pictures of the progress for you folks out of town.

I’ve found myself falling back into old habits of staying up late and sleeping in. That’s the way life used to be before kids – back in the roaring twenties. Carefree days spent sponsoring the Ben & Jerry’s diet (a pint in the afternoon followed by a sensible pint in the evening) and Magic cards. I keep saying that I’m going to start listening to my doctor and wakeup early to exercise. Then the late night glow of the monitor drags me back into its clutches.

I’m hoping that Madie’s school schedule will force me back into some routine again. I’ve got plans to do a bit of work on the garden this week, but nothing that requires any imagination at this point.

Anna Rose Enssle was born last night and we couldn’t be happier for my cousin Neal and his wife Tara. Ben and Madie are climbing the walls, so we’re getting ready to go meet the newest family member.