Update from Melinda
Lily rolled over yesterday. She went right from her stomach to her back in one swift movement. It did; however, appear to be by complete accident according to the startled look on her face. She didn’t repeat the event no matter how many times I put her back on her stomach. Fine by me, I’m in no hurry for her to become mobile yet. Her staying in one place is often the only way I get to have a shower these days.
Both girls are doing well. Madie’s constant search for knowledge is keeping me on my toes. Every day it seems she has a new question, one that often has me thinking hard about both the question and the answer. I love this about her and do my best to give her a straight and honest answer. I try to encourage this communication between us since I know that in a few short years she will look elsewhere for answers.
Lily is growing at an astounding rate, which is pretty typical the first year. Her smiles warm me up inside like a ray of sunshine. I’ve come to notice that she has the same eyes as Ben, which would explain why I can’t seem to stop looking at her. She reminds me of him so much. My heart aches for him constantly and I often wonder how I will make it through this life living with this pain, this ache in my soul.
One way I think is to help others going through the same or similar experience(s). I’ve really begun to get into my scrapbooking, realizing how important it is to preserve my memories of Ben. All of my pictures of him have become priceless possessions since they are all that I have of him now. However, scrapbooking with others is difficult when they don’t have a clue to what you’re going through. Especially when they’re working on their own kid’s books, blissfully unaware of how lucky they are. Anyway, I’m thinking of becoming a consultant for Creative Memories, specializing in helping other parents who have also lost a child. I could provide a way and a place for bereaved parents (or other family members) to scrapbook with others who have also suffered a loss. A place to find support and healing. I’ll try to keep you posted on my progress.
Anyway, it’s late and I’m losing my train of thought so I guess I’ll try to get some sleep. Take care everyone, and have a good weekend.
Melinda
