Hi everyone!
Sorry about the absence of updates. It’s difficult to explain why, although, Dean did a good job in his latest post. This journey is such a personal one. Yet, I so miss reading all of the comments, they really do make me feel better.
Madie is doing really well. She is very excited for kindergarten this fall and asks me on a weekly basis how much longer this “school break” is going to last. She also speaks of Ben often and misses him more than she will admit.
I am doing ok. Every day is a struggle to get through without Ben. Having Madie helps me cope and baby pineapple is now constantly making her presence felt as well. As wonderful as they both are, there is still a giant hole in my life and in my heart where Ben is supposed to be. This loss has sent me on a lifetime journey of spiritual questioning and discovery. I don’t know where I’ll end up; I only hope that it involves the belief that I will see my son again someday.
I hope everyone had a good 4th of July holiday yesterday. Madie has been feeling somewhat under the weather, so we kept things low key and had some of our neighbors over for food and fireworks. All the kids had a blast, and the street in now littered with blackened debris.
Well, that’s it for now. Please check back soon for future updates on the “Secret Garden” and the Frederick/Firestone “Relay for Life” event coming this August.
Melinda
My dear friends, please remember I am here to be and outlet whenever you need it. I can listen, cry, laugh, dream, and/or walk with you on your journey.
A thought that helped me through the loss of my mom is believing that there is a reason for everything, that the powers that be lead me down the path of this life because I am suppose to go that way. That I have a great guardian angel on my side, and that when my time comes I WILL see her again. Whether it be at the end of my journey or the beginning of my next lifetime. I believe she visits my son ever so often as he will just start laughing at the thin air in front of him.
The loss of my mom doesn’t compare to the loss of Ben, as everyone experiences their loss on different levels and different ways. I also know I cannot take the pain away, but I am willing to do everything I can to be your friend on your journey to help in any way I can.
You will see your son again, as I truly believe that once your souls connect you are always bound to meet in heaven and in all future lifetimes.
One last thing, I read this and I have found it true more often than not. It was a poem called Pennies from heaven. Every time you look down and see a penny on the ground, that is your loved ones who have gone before you throwing a token down to let you know they are thinking about you from heaven. The times I need my mom the most I always seem to stumble across a penny from heaven. So keep your eyes open, as Ben may be tossing pennies your way. :o)
Love you all.
Shan
I just wanted to write you a note and let you know that I’m thinking about you and Ben.
Love,
Cori
Melinda,
I just wanted you to know that I too think of Ben on a daily basis. I tell everyone I know how brave he was and what a blessing he was and still is to our family. Our lives will never be the same and are better for having known him and his bravery. He was truly an angel and God’s gift. He will always be loved, cherished and never forgot.
I love you and I am always here for you.
Love,
Sara Nelson
I love you guys and you are never far from my thought. I missed your posts. I am always here and I would love to have Maddie some time after we all get over this nasty bug we have. My niece just turnd 9 and she stays with me with the nephew too at least once a week so we should get them togther to play!